My GOD, my way….

Do you believe in GOD?

Please, please, please, please, PLEASE…don’t close the page. There’s no need to panic. This is not about any philosophical journey towards the realization of the existence of almighty. This is just......thinking aloud.

Unfortunately, before I embark on the actual topic, I’ll have to state the somewhat crude idea of GOD that I have.

Actually, whenever someone asks me this question, I start responding with an immensely incomprehensible complex analysis about the ‘relativistic symbolic interactionism between space and time’ (or whatever it may sound like) with the desperate hope that, the one who asked the question will be dead scared and break off at midway of my answer. I would never dread to complete this answer because frankly, I don’t have one and of course, it does not go well with my cool, intellectual image to admit it.
In fact, the biggest problem I find with GOD is that by rule, he(or she)* is always explained by things or incidents which cannot be explained. Hence, sometimes I cannot believe in him because his presence is not convincing. Again, sometimes I have no choice but to believe in him since his absence is not conclusive.

Anyways, that is not my point.
In spite of all these uncertainties, I might have framed somewhere in my mind a picture of god, but my question is…. why would GOD care about that? I mean…..he created light, this universe, life itself (only he knows the complete list) and also has the responsibilities of running them properly. Then, how come he would bother whether an infinitesimal component of it believes in him or not? Does it affect running the system properly?
Yet, we are convinced that if we are a non-believer, GOD will send us to hell. As if he holds a personal grudge against anyone who does not believe in him.
But why?
Is it because that is something we would expect from the universe, had we created it?
Why do we try to predict someone whom we cannot even completely imagine, on the basis of our emotions?
It does not make any sense.
Does the main generator running a factory bother whether a bearing in the cog wheel of the patching section knows or believes it? His concern, I guess, should be whether the cog wheel itself is running properly.
It’s a poor metaphor, I know. But I ask you, for all we know, is there any way to be sure whether GOD resembles an old man with a long beard more than an enormous, all pervading generator?
If we always do the square thing in our life, which, I guess is more essential in keeping the whole system running properly, then we have tried to do our bit and that is the only thing that should matter on the judgment day!!!
Don’t tell me to buy the fact that GOD won’t be fair to us because we never bribed him faith.

There is another thing about faith. Whereas GOD doesn’t have to, I don’t feel anyone else should bother whether I have it or not.
Think about it. My faith gives me strength in the moments of crisis, makes me hang on when there is no hope and comforts me that there will be someone looking over my loved ones when I won’t be around. So, if I don’t have faith, its at my own risk. It is no one else’s business. It can be suggested, not imposed.
I feel it is an intrusion in one’s privacy to tell him things like, “Have faith” or “Don’t lose faith”.
At best, you can suggest, “Why don’t you try faith? It might work….”
At any rate, I believe its just a tool GOD handed us to do our job better.

And exactly because of this, I do not understand the concept of prayers being answered. Faith was already given to us by GOD to find motivation from within, its not meant to ask for any leverage from the source itself.
After all, GOD is not an ATM machine from where you can draw favors based on the balance of faith you credited.

Furthermore, we, i.e. human beings, generally conceive GOD as a human, out of our arrogance.
We very smugly feel that we are the greatest and wisest beings in the universe, the greatest creation of GOD.
But, we must remember, he created a universe which is so big for us, that we consider it to be infinite attributing to our inability to find the limits.
So, no matter how much we please ourselves thinking we are GOD’s centre of attraction, his blue-eyed-boy so to say, he perhaps doesn’t even recall creating the first of us and making them replicate.
We are so proud and awed of our consciousness, we frequently make the mistake of thinking it is always on the headlines of the universe’s evening news.

The so-called, established believers may announce a price on my head for saying this, but I think they have defamed GOD for time immemorial. They have put up to us an image of an idle accountant, sitting in a surveillance room, monitoring who among us has paid how much faith to him.
If I have to trust, I would trust he has a lot more important things on his mind 24/7.


All of you, who haven't dozed off till now, I thank you for your patience and promise I won’t torture you much more. I just have one final thought to share.
In an open heart surgery, we can see that a heart can be stopped beating by applying an icepack, and started again by an electric pulse. It is a truth by our standards, medically proven. So, the obvious question lingers.
Who gave the first pulse?
Search all you want for the answer. But...do it yourselves. If there is something like GOD, I don’t think you can know him unless you find him yourself.

However, if you come to me in that course of search………Well, I still have that analysis about the ‘relativistic symbolic interactionism between space and time’ up my sleeves.
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* Here, I shall refer to GOD only by ‘he’. Believe me, I have no gender preferences. This is just for convenience in writing. If you want to replace them by ‘she’, please be my guest.